If I ever became a gargoyles villain...

By Shogun Raptor


     ..I'd keep my plans for human genocide at home, AWAY from my nosy majordomo

     ...I'd check employees for pupils and/or conduct mandatory hearing tests with an iron
bell, taking note of any reactions

     ...I'd make sure any clones of my enemies that were as smart as I would have the sense
of humor and attention span of a two-year-old, while it may be a glaring weakness on his
part, it does help when he's about to shoot you and crossing your eyes and yelling "booga
booga!" makes him drop his gun, your cash and begin laughing uncontrollably and rolling
around on the floor

     ...I'd word requests to any fey in my employment EXACTLY, god knows what the
little buggers do given leeway

     ...I'd aim for the head when shooting a poison dart at my ex-mate's human friend

     ...I'd make sure to keep track of when the immortal I share the pain bond with was in
a meeting and keep a copper-lined jockey shorts and a gas-powered generator at the ready

     ...I'd make sure when stealing a child to knock his mother unconcious first

     ...I'd keep a few public humiliation spells handy when the tide of battle turned against me;
it's tough to fight when trying to hold up one's loincloth

     ...my mutate hordes would have a considerable amount of pigeon DNA; sure they might
not win, but it would be fun to see the Clan's expressions

     ...my mercenary cyborgs would have their brains bionically augmented as well as heightened
turning and proximity detections, and failing that, magnetic force fields to repel them apart should
they fall for the old "crash into each other" scheme